So here I am again, pretty much where I’ve been since the end of July. I have re-injured my torn tendon and I’m back on crutches and wearing the boot. I was doing so well darn it! Wasn’t doing any aerobics, minimized my trips up and down the stairs and didn’t standing for too long without taking a break. The pain was minimal and the swelling was waaaay down. I still had a slight limp but knew eventually my normal gait would return.
Last weekend I went to a shower and decided that since everything was going so well I would wear some boots. The heel on the boot was modest (so I thought) and I felt really good walking around in them. On my way home from the shower I stopped at the store to pick up a few things I’d forgotten the day before. While in line it hit me, literally and figuratively. The type of pain I was beginning to feel meant I was headed back to the couch and my orthopedic accessories. I hobbled out of the store and managed to get myself home without breaking any speed laws.
During the course of this injury you’ve heard me talk about looking for the lesson in all of this. Well obviously I haven’t learned it. Last Monday I cancelled my classes for the day which is something I rarely do. My hope was that two days of chilling out would allow me to get back in the groove again. Ha, was I wrong! On Wednesday I went back to school, with the Mr.‘s assistance of course, I still can’t drive. My student s were just as supportive as they were in the beginning and probably didn‘t mind the extra day off. I also decided early on that I would give this more time before I went back to the doctor. After so many visits this summer I knew what his recommendation would be. Stay off it, apply ice and take the medication he had prescribed. So that’s what I’ve been doing.
This is beginning to feel like a way of life and that is not the mindset I want to be in or one that will help me in the healing process. Honestly, I think it’s my independence that keeps getting the best of me. It’s kind of like give me an inch and I’ll take a half mile because I know a full one is out of the question. Before the re-injury I had become very adept at making modifications. When going downstairs I’d make sure I had everything I needed so I didn’t have to make repeated trips up and down. Driving was limited to only what was necessary, and meals were nothing fancy or complicated.
Obviously even that was too much. Right now of course I’m having a small pity party thinking about all the things I wanted to have done by now. By now I had planned to have at least two other tables done; one pink themed for BCA and one Halloween table that Gabbi and I were going to collaborate on. Since I’ve had so much time on my hands I’ve pinned and bookmarked a cazillion things I want to make. But alas, it’s just not going to happen. Neither is that gut busting sweat inducing aerobic workout that I’ve been missing since the end of July.
Moving forward I’m going to mind my manners and do my best to tune into the voice in my head that says “be still”. The absolute last thing I want is surgery. However, I really feel that given what I do for a living, and doing what I’m passionate about, there is bound to be some downtime with this tendon. I hope that doesn’t sound defeatist because that’s not the intention. It’s more about acknowledging that there may be some limitations.
In a couple of months all the kids will be home for the holidays and I want to be ready. Between now and then I intend to get better and do only a little at a time. Typically during the holiday season I’d have a couple of all day sessions in the kitchen. Not so much this year. My kids would gladly have takeout food and I know it, but the mommy in me won’t allow that. Patience is a virtue and whoever coined that phrase surely had me in mind.
There are a few obligatory things that I will do and will have to ask for help with. And that is the hard part. Not the things I will do; the asking for help. Here comes the Ms. Independent streak again! I just wanted you to know why I haven’t been posting regularly. There are a few things that I’ve done and haven’t posted so that will help keep me in the loop. In order to make Sweet Sensations what I want it to be I have to take care of myself a little bit better and if that means slowing down, that’s what I have to do. Thank you so much for your support and don’t give up on me.